Tag Archives: baby

Separation Anxiety: Part 1

15 Jun

I remember laying in the bed late at night and I felt like was dreaming and I had to go to the bathroom. All of a sudden it felt like a little was seeping out and I thought “I am too old to wet the bed!” So I got up and went to the bathroom. As I finished and I was about to wash my hands there was a big (sorry so graphic) gush of fluid…my water broke! I yelled out “your son is coming!” I waddled into the bedroom, called the doctor and proceeded to pack a bag. No, my bag was not packed because I was going into labor six weeks early. On the way to the hospital my water broke AGAIN!

Once I got to the hospital things went pretty smoothly until it was time to push. The doctor came in, halfway through, and saw that there was another water pocket obstructing the path for my son to come out. Once that was broken I gave one good push and he slid out.  When my placenta did not come easily the doctor informed me that it was attached to my uterine wall. The nurses took a couple of pictures my me and my baby and I was taken up to surgery to have my placenta separated from my uterus. When I came back down my baby was not in the room and I was half delusional as I was being told that my son had complications and had to be taken to Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia and I would only be able to see him for a few minutes before they took him. They brought him in a big incubator with a lot of wires connected and not two minutes after they rolled him in alarms started ringing and they had to take him away.

Not two hours after giving birth I was left in the hospital room by myself with no baby.


Things Change- It’s just the beginning

2 May

When I first became a teenager I remember being very self-conscious about my body. I wore baggy jeans that I could take off without unbuttoning, big bulky sneakers, and shirts I was swimming in. Even when I got a little older and did decide to “show a little skin” I felt uncomfortable, of course now I would kill to have that body again.

 By my junior year of high school I became a little more comfortable with my body and I embraced it. I appreciated that  I could eat what I wanted without having to workout a lick. Once I hit college I loved to shop because I could go in just about any store and grab a 4 or a 6 and knew it would fit, until it didn’t!

I remember going to buy a pair of jeans, my usual size 6, and they didn’t quite fit. So I figured “well we (my boyfriend and I) have been going out to eat a lot, I guess it’s starting to catch up to me” and didn’t think much of it. Not more than a couple of weeks later I was in the mall with a friend and decided to get some jeans and this time the 8 didn’t fit! I thought “there is no way I am bigger than an 8 that fast?” I think I tried on a few styles before I realized it was me and not the jeans. During the next few days, maybe weeks, I was feeling nauseous, and then the vomiting started as did the processing of what was going on with me. “I have gained weight really fast, I have been really nauseous lately, did I miss a cycle?” I took a home pregnancy test and realized that the weight gain was just the beginning of the many changes I was getting ready to go through.